a-flyleaf.github.io

gi5l help

May 3, 2026

5ive-minute p54ttling$ vt. 4 $lightly-b5oken keybo45đ.
(Five-minute prattlings ft. a slightly-broken keyboard.)


$evel key$ on my keybo4vđ h4v3 bvoken, 4pp4vently ivvevev$ibly. Thi$ i$ wh4t the kiđ$ c4ll 4 minov nightm4ve, e$peci4lly con$iđeving they 4ve $ome ov the mo$t vvequently-u$eđ lettev$ in the Engli$h l4ngu4ge. Which i$ pvob4bly, gv4nt3đ, why they bvoke in the vi$t pl4ce 4t 4ll.

W\iting like thi$, I think, i$ kinđ ov 4kin to le4\ning 4 new l4ngu4g3, pe\iođ. I know 4l\e4đy th4t the g\4tuitou$ u%e ov “đ,” which 4t l34$t in C\o4ti4n h4$ 4 “j” $ounđ, i$ bounđ to c4u$e $ome đeg\ee ov p$ychic đ4m4ge to 4t le4$t one pe$on.

You know, the \ key $pecivic4lly h4$ been bo\keđ vo\ month$.


4t $ome point in the 2010$ I 4ttempteđ to te4ch my$elv how to u$e the Đvo\4k keybo4\đ. \epo\teđly it’$ mo\e ~e\gonomic, bette\ vo\ one’$ h4nđ$—though, ov cou$e, the \e4l culp\it to w\i$t $t\4in i$ \epetitive $t\4in 4$ 4 concept.

Đo you eve\ not notice how v\equently you u$e xyz Thign until the thing $uđđenly i$ not the\e, 4nđ then $ometime$ you’\e v\eeđ but then 4l$o $ometime$ you’\e like. wow wh4t the vuck. eve\ything $uck$ 4 little mo\e without The Thign, 4ctu4lly. How đo people $u\vive without The Thing. Lo4đ-be4\ing Thing. gi\l help

no\m4lly I u$e copy-p4$te vo\ the [lette\ th4t no\m4lly enđ$ the wo\đ “lette"] 4nđ th4t $uit$ me ju$t vine. MULTIPLE lette$, though? hello??? in THI$ economy????? i 4m inventing 4 new b\4nđ ov like, l33t$pe4k. o\ w/e. gi\l help

i h4ve to 4$$ume thi$ i$ wh4t it’$ like to


I h4ve, to $ome đeg5ee, 4 vun 4nđ cool thing (4utho5’$ note: it i$ neithe5 vun nov cool), known vo5m4lly 4$ ~4uđito5y p5oce$$ing đi$o5đe5~, o5 le$$ vo5m4lly it’$ the thing whe5e $omeone $4y$ 4 pe5vectly 4ccept4ble $entence 4nđ it t4ke$ $eve54l $econđ$ the5e4vte5 vo5 the lo4đing b45 4bov3 my he4đ to vill up. Like, ohhh, th4t’$ wh4t you we5e t5ying to $4y, now i get it. Ye$. 4nyw4y wh4t I w4$ t5ying to w5ite l4$t 5ounđ i$ th4t both typing 4nđ 5e4đing thi$ i$ 4 vuckign nightm45e engli$h l4ngu4g3 p5oce$$ing m4l4đy $imul4to5. Like the $h4pe ov the wo5đ$ i$ kiiinđ4 the5e, 5ight? but It I$ W5ong:TM:. Ve5y much $o. je$u$ gođ thi$ p454g54ph i$ t4king m3 the whol3 tim3 limit to w5ite—


Eve5y đ4y we $t54y vu5the5 v5om gođ’$ light.

pvob4bly-velev4nt context, ye$ I 4m v4mili4v with home$tuck 4nđ no I điđ not g5ow up in the inte5net e54 in which typing like thi$ w4$ common. 4ctu4lly I w4$ 4 vuckign typing $nob. Iv you type 4ll-lowe5c4$e 4ll-the-time obviou$ly it i$ bec4u$e you 45e 4n illite58 vool. 4 blight upon 4ll hum4nity 4nđ eve5y pixel, eve5y byte (note: young $nob điđ not know wh4t 4 “byte” w4$, 4nđ in v4ct b45ely h4đ 4ny concept ov it until v35y 53c3ntly), w4$t3đ to 53co5đ $uch $t4in$ to the w5itt3n vo5m.

4nyw5y i think thi$ epheme54l little exe5iment i$ Kinđ Ov Cool, 4ctu4lly. even though i will be ve5y VE5Y h4ppy to 5etu5n to 4ll my vully-vunctioning hotkey$ 4nđ the like. c4n’t even $4y 4 p5ope5 “vuck” in thi$ economy, y’know? “vuck.” Euck. m45k vuck35bu5g. incomp5ehen$ible-4$$ po$t.


“ok but how’d you code this post tho”

Onscreen keyboard accessibility feature my lifering beloved. Remember, kids, accessibility is important (I write, on the heel of The Least Accessible L33t$p34k Nightmare Post Ever)! You never know when you’ll need it!!!!1!

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